The Penis Epiphany

Because I haven’t started enough debate on Fetlife and twitter this morning……

I just read this post:  The Penis Epiphany

Go ahead. Go read it.  I’ll wait.

Back?  Good.

Now as someone who absolutely HATES to receive unsolicited cock shots this article caught my attention.  I’ve yet to come across anyone who has a fetish for the unsolicited cock shot and can say 100% that if you message me and your profile picture is a cock shot I won’t be responding.   But reading this post I found myself disagreeing with a lot of it.  I’m not appalled at the site of a cock.  It is the message an unsolicited cock shot sends I’m appalled at.

Yesterday, while watching one of Allstate’s amazing and super funny mayhem commercials, I had an epiphany: penises are ugly. I mean, really, when’s the last time you saw a bumper sticker or t-shirt that said “penises make me smile,” or saw a commercial with a woman looking at a man’s penis like just the very sight of it is making her wild with desire? You haven’t, because penises are ugly.

I disagree.

I honestly can say that I’ve never found any of my partners penises ugly.  Cut or uncut.  What I have found is that in our society it is much more accepted to use a woman’s sexuality (ie: her breasts or cleavage) in marketing, photos, bumper stickers or whatever.   If a woman were to wear a shirt with “penises make me smile” written on it they would be slut shamed.

Put a good-looking, big-breasted girl in a low cut top jogging down the road, and watch the men drool all over themselves and almost get in accidents as they rubberneck to get a better view. Let a man wear something that shows half their penis or scrotum, and see what kind of response that gets. Let him wear a short pair of running shorts with no underwear, with the package playing peek-a-boo as he runs … the women may be looking, but not for the same reasons.

First I’d like to say that I as a woman along with many other women I know would also droll at that site.  But I have to wonder why is the writer comparing breasts to a penis and scrotum?   One is above the waist and in many countries (other than the US) it is perfectly acceptable for both men and women to be topless.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m a heterosexual woman in my mid-thirties with a healthy sex drive, but that doesn’t mean I want some stranger’s penis wagging at me on the street, or to have their balls on display for my inspection while I eat in a restaurant. I could see it now, some man flirting with me from across a crowded room … he spreads his legs, oh so provocatively, to bear his clean-shaven scrotum and expose the head of his penis, knowing I will soon be his — NOT! Why? Because while us heterosexual woman want and need our man’s penis, we don’t fantasize about how it LOOKS, the curvature, the vein protruding from one side; we fantasize about how it FEELS.

Actually………I DO fantasize about how it LOOKS, the curvature, the vein protruding from one side along with fantasizing how it FEELS.  I fantasize about ALL of it.  The look, the feel, the smell and the taste.   My fantasies involve all of my senses.

They may be ugly, but we women love them all the same.

Please don’t speak for me because I don’t recall ever finding andy my partner’s penises ugly.

Is it me or does that line sound really sex negative or body shaming?   Can you imagine the outcry if a men’s website posted something like this about a woman’s vagina being ugly?

Now I don’t want to give the impression that I want to spend all my time looking at cock or if I’m involved with someone I want them to send me cock shots.  But I also don’t like that the impression reading this gives me is that I close my eyes during sex so as not to see that ugly thing below your waist while you pleasure me with it.

Have I ever mentioned I have a suit fetish?

I am far more likely to get more excited over a photo of them in a suit than a cock shot.    Have them send me a photo in an expensive suit with a beauitful tie and I melt.  When I know exactly what is underneath that suit and I’ll be reaching for my njoy Eleven.

I really hate reading things like this because I think it only adds to the stigma and negativity that surrounds sex in our culture.

This ends my rant of the day.

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